Learn to be OK with NOT being OK
So there's this woman. She is awesome. Inspiring. She's got a defined waist, hair that always looks styled even when it's not. She's into Pilates and kale juice, she rocks her Lululemon outfits, even after three angelic children. I hear many women (or similar story with the men too) talk like this, wanting to be like 'this woman'.
Well, actually, this woman doesn't exist. I've seen hundreds of women through my bootcamps and through my training and people are vulnerable and honest to me a lot of the time so I know the truth. It is easy to believe that Everyone Else is doing so much better than you. Everyone else is losing weight or gaining muscle so much faster or so much more effortlessly than you. Everyone else has their 'shit' together. There is no Everyone Else. No one can escape the reality of family and deadlines and the thermodynamic laws that govern metabolism.
We are all imperfect, wonderful, messy, human beings, with hops, fears, desires, jobs, kids, dogs, and toilets to clean. Once we are honest with ourselves we can start to become better versions of ourselves.
Reconsider your expectations.
Sure you could get Halle Berry ripped if you literally had nothing else to prioritise in your life. Their lives are not awesome because of it, they have to make tremendous sacrifices. It probably isn't worth it for the most of us. Getting into slightly better shape and a healthier routine doesn't take much effort. That may be more realistic right now.
Find new 'That Girl" inspiration
How about the local school teacher: She is on her feet all day, spends her lunch playing tag with her 6 year olds, and has patience and calm like you have never seen. Or the 70 year old woman just down the road, who is ageing so gracefully, or your neighbour who is so good at growing their own vegetables.
Learn to be OK with being NOT OK
As a personal trainer, my job is literally to get you guys more comfortable with being more uncomfortable.
- Step into the discomfort
- Let things be a bit messy
- Be human, be normal
- How might you make things a little but simpler for yourself?
- How could you stretch yourself a bit.
Life will never be completely OK. Work on making things a little bit better. And have fun with it.
Find your Hacks
It is not all or nothing. If you can't do the workout you want to do, don't do nothing, if you can't cook the healthy dish you wanted to, don't do nothing. Find a work-around. Get help if you need it. Everyone has to work at it, even me, even Halle Berry, even Brad Pitt. Especially at the beginning.